On Blogging & Gaming

You may have noticed that posts around here are few and far between as of late.  This is due to several things.  First and probably most of all is the fact that I’ve been extremely depressed as of late.  Which honestly makes it very hard to write anything.  I struggle to find any motivation to even log in and start on a new post when I get like this.  For that, I’m sorry.  I also sometimes feel bad that I don’t write more about Dungeons & Dragons or cartoons, things I wanted to tackle but can’t figure out a good way to do it.

Even worse is when the dark thoughts start creeping into my head and make me want to give up this blog entirely.  Why bother? It seems like I’m just talking to myself and the vast majority of my hits are just people coming from Google Images to see the few Adventure Time or Thundercats pictures I have used in previous posts.  That maybe I should have just left this entire thing to collect dust after I left WoW, as I think most just stopped paying attention after that. I try to stay positive and say that just because I don’t get hits or comments, doesn’t mean someone out there isn’t enjoying this.  I’m sure someone is.

The other reason is mainly because I don’t know what to write about because I’m kind of stuck in gaming limbo at the moment.  No one game has my entire attention right now.  I’ve kind have been bouncing around between playing Mass Effect 3, Skyrim, Deus Ex: Human Revolution,  (Deep breath now…) Fallout New Vegas, SW:TOR AND I’ve begun to once again miss WoW.

That last one is kind of weird, because there isn’t much that I really enjoyed in Cataclysm.  It’s mostly just that I miss the people there I guess.  I was part of a really amazing guild full of fun people, but the game itself was boring me to tears.  It just wasn’t worth the money to keep playing.  Now with Mists of Pandaria news trickling in, I’ve got the urge to go back and say hello.  It almost feels shameful in some respects because I’m supposed to be a “TOR player” now.

I have tried to emulate that experience of finding fun people to play with in TOR too. But it’s been… well, a mixed bag.  I seem to play at all the wrong times for the guilds I’ve joined.  By the time I log on, there’s one person other person online.  I do enjoy the actual game though, the story is exactly what I always wanted from my WoW experience.  But I miss the social atmosphere and ease of just hopping in and out of groups from WoW.  Say what you want about the Dungeon Finder, it was a godsend to shy people like me.  And when the topic gets approached on the TOR forums,  someone usually not-so-politely states that if you’re not a social butterfly, you need to GTFO from MMOs.  How kind.

However, I didn’t leave WoW for TOR because I hated WoW, or think the game is dying or doomed, or have some personal vendetta against Ghostcrawler.  I left it because at the moment, I didn’t have anything to do.  I just wanted to do something different.  Does that somehow place me firmly in the camp of a diehard TOR-ite?  TOR’s great and all, but I would hardly call it perfect.  It is improving and the team working on it seems completely interested in improving that experience for everyone.  When it boils down to it, I really do enjoy both games.  So why do I feel shame about missing WoW sometimes?

It partially has something to do with how other people view the situation.  I left WoW, started playing SWTOR, and if I go back to WoW, it must be because TOR failed in some way.  Even the slightest hint of talking about coming back to WoW spurs old guildmates’ chuckles about how BAD The Old Republic must be. But it’s not. Each game fulfills a certain need of mine.  I enjoy them both in different ways.  It drives me nuts to hear people talk like that.  It reminds me of the ‘old days’ when – one moment, gotta get my old man hat and rocking chair out…  there we go. – when we used to argue and battle about SEGA vs. Nintendo.  You could only like one.  You had to throw your hat in with one or other.  Which was completely STUPID.  And worse, continues to happen to this day with Sony/Microsoft/Nintendo or MMOs like Rift/TOR/WoW.

It’s okay to like more than one thing.  It is!  The only really issue for me is time and money. Honestly, I wish there was a way I could squeeze everything I like about both games into one big gooshie lump of a game-y thing-a-majig but I can’t.  So now I find myself in the awkward position of not knowing what to do or what to play.  My TOR subscription is set until July, and I hope to have heard SOME kind of news about the Mists release date by then.  But until then, it’s hard to play anything without getting my innards all in a twist, and when I can’t play – well, I have a bit of a struggling writing about it.

Ultimately, I wonder if I made a mistake sticking with the word “Odd” in the title.  It originally made sense when I would write lavish posts about things that I found very weird in games.  Like giant skeletons with no explanation, or how a huge dwarven dam looked like it was spitting at you, but now my rambling is less odd and more…  well, I dunno what I can describe my writing as.  I contemplated on Twitter about scrapping it all and starting fresh so I wouldn’t have that name sitting on my head, but at the same time I’ve grown quite attached to it.  I’ve also been trying to push my posts to be more ‘personal’ and worry less about ‘objective content’ or worrying if something is necessarily ‘funny enough’.  I suppose this post would be a good step in that direction but then again I am not sure.

Anyway, I just wanted to let everyone know exactly what is going on around here.  We’re trying to get everything sorted out and figured out, but as we approach the end of the first year as “The Land of Odd” and my fifth year of writing this blog across all its incarnations, there is a lot on my mind about what to do with it.  I thank you all for your patience and would welcome any and all suggestions or criticisms about this website.  I want to make it awesome and enjoyable for people, and keep it fun to write.  So feedback is – as always – appreciated, and I apologize for all the delays.

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Posted on March 15, 2012, in Random Bits & Bobs. Bookmark the permalink. 9 Comments.

  1. Ay, ay, ay, ay, ay. There must be something in the air at the moment. First off, for the depression, you have a very big *hug* from me. As someone who was recently diagnosed with RBD (recurrent brief depression) having struggled for the best part of a year with ‘pits of doom’ I know how bloody draining and… depressing it can be. I also know that, for me anyway, there isn’t a whole bunch anyone can do, I just have to hunker down and wait for the worst of the thunderclouds to pass.

    Secondly, The WoW thing? I un-subbed in November, not because I was cross, but because my play time seemed to consist of logging in to each of my (many) ‘toons and trying to find something for one of them to do that would fire me up and make me want to play. After weeks of doing this, I decided to have a break, as feeling like I ‘should’ play is hardly the same thing as playing for fun. I don’t think that a game is ‘failing’ if people choose to have a break and try something else (for me it was Rift). Nor does it mean that the other games has ‘failed’ if you decide to stop playing game no. 2 and return to game no. 1. I wish I could keep up with more than one game at a time but I seem to be a serial monogamist with MMOs, only one game at a time please…

    So my blog has been utterly neglected also. I did manage to post the other day, and I have renewed (kinda( my WoW sub, but I’m still not sure exactly what I want to do. I know I can’t raid because I don’t have the time (or inclination) to give it my all, so that pretty much closes off end game. The biggest enjoyment I had in WoW was when I was RPing so I’m sorta hoping that I’ll get back to that. Who knows?

    Please don’t delete your blog – there are waaaaaaaaaay to many exceptional posts here for it to get lost, but also, don’t put yourself under pressure either (I know you know this!) and just write as and when something sparks you off. It’s ok to have a break, it’s ok to burn out and need to take some time for yourself. *more hugs*

    • Oh! I didn’t intend to ever delete anything! I apologize if I gave that impression. It was more so a thought of abandoning it than deleting it. I don’t want to get rid of anything! 😀

      Thank you for the warm wishes though. I might have to pay a visit to Rift now that they’re doing that “free to level 20” thing too.

  2. Nooooo … just take a break but don’t go away. I think sometimes since I “read” you on Twitter I somehow seem to think you know I’m there so there’s no need to comment here and say Hi!, which is rude of me.

    Us shy introverts have to stick together and continue to annoy the GTFOs by playing their MMOs!

    • I don’t mind the lack of comments as much as it is really disheartening to see 200 hits on my dashboard, only to find out that 180 of those are people looking for pictures of Finn and Jake. So only 20 hits for the actual content?! /sigh

      But yes, we introverts must teach those big meanies!

  3. I feel your pain with severl wow/swtor points there, I left WoW for the exact same reasons you did. No bridges burnt, I’ve set it so i’m still in the same guild who insist they’ll wait for my (and a good few others) return from swtor. The group finding ease in WoW was a godsend, and I can’t wait for it in the new patch 1.2, I, like most others, just don’t have the heart to stand spamming in the fleet.

    The main issues I have with that game right now is a lack of players and population. Again, like most others, I seem to be on a republic avoiding empire loving server which means gathering group for operatins is a thankless task. We, along with 2 other guilds have combined chat channels to form ops from each others ranks when we’re short of players, its a plaster orver a gaping wound and I hope the playerbase improves soon. Sounds like i’m not enjoying the game…I really am loving it, those are just the downsides. In wow it was asshats, which I have yet to run into in any number yet in tor.

    Enough of my griping; I personally like the blog title and have it on my blog dashboard as a favourite. Keep the title, even if the subject matter changes, its unique and can cover all sorts of issues, from gaming to real life. A few friends are more than a little down right now, I put it down to the end of winter hibernation. Early spring might help, get some vitamin D absorbed, we look forward to any post, gaming or otherwise.

    • I think they said the group finder was coming but NOT in 1.2, if I am recalling correctly. I’m thinking probably 1.3 or 1.4 at the latest. Still, it will be a happy day when it arrives. Even contacting people through chat channels can be a nerve wracking experience for me sometimes. Hence why I got pretty much nothing but dailies done during Burning Crusade.

      I think I’ve had better luck than most in terms of ‘asshats’. Either I have far too much patience, or I just somehow miss them completely, but I’ve never had many run ins with jerks in WoW before or after the Dungeon Finder. In TOR, I run into them now and again for either the Esseles or Black Talon. Mostly folks who haven’t figured out there class yet, and see anyone’s attempt at help as an insult. So the Jedi Sentinel wearing nothing but +Cunning or +Willpower gear, etc. But beyond level 12? Nothin’. Unless you count Chat Trolls. But those are everywhere.

      Me being down usually has more to do with the fact that I’m Bipolar, so it comes and goes (you can actually tell because the frequency of posts increases when I’m manic, and slows when I’m depressed), but hopefully spring will put a bit of pep in my step. Thank you for the warm wishes! 😀

  4. I think you should DM me on twitter and come play SWTOR w/us on Sanctum.

    • I kinda abandoned my attempts at finding stuff at the moment I heard that when they eventually add server transfers, your legacy transfers with you (or at least I THINK that’s what they said). So I’ve decided to level characters on one server, build up my legacy and unlocks, and then when transfers become available, my legacy will *cough* spread its wild oats so to speak.

      But when that time comes I will definitely look you up!

  5. I think no matter what, you should write about what you want to. This blog is about your thoughts. Sure we can ask for you to comment on things, but ultimately to stay passionate about it, you should stick to what you wanna talk about.

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